The Biggest Manifestation Myth

The Myth

Recently during a session, a client blamed themselves for bad luck, saying their worries manifested into obstacles. She felt she had to suppress her very normal thoughts and emotions. That broke my heart. 

So, now I have some beef with modern spirituality. I'm sure you're familiar with phrases such as:

“What you think, you manifest!”

“Don’t think negative thoughts, you’ll attract negativity!” 

“Be careful what you think about, your worries will manifest instead of what you actually want!”

Not only is it incorrect, this myth can become quite harmful. It oversimplifies the human experience, and often leaves people feeling anxious, guilty, or ashamed for having normal thoughts. I feel passionately about this huge misconception due to my own experiences and what I’ve seen with my clients. 

Let’s talk about it, and look at the truth beyond the myth. It's important to always be discerning in all areas of life, but especially in spirituality, which is a sacred practice.

 

 

The Truth

There was a time I also believed that my worries and fears might accidentally manifest into my reality, especially if I allowed the thoughts to run through my consciousness too often.

That belief had me trying to suppress and fight with my own mind.  Anyone familiar with this knows how doing that only multiplies the thought. It gives the thought power it hadn't initially have. It builds your situation or worry into being worse than it is. To add self blame to the mix is a recipe for a real bad time! 

 

What we constantly focus on shapes our perception. When we loop through negative thoughts, your mind filters your reality to confirm this belief. This is explained by neuroscience.

Because of this, you can intentionally shift your focus. Things such as self acceptance, therapy, reiki, shadow work, or self care, you shift the narrative, so you're able to start seeing the good, even when life isn’t easy. This is mindfulness, the act of being aware and accepting of the present moment. 

 

Manifesting isn't about forcing a positive mindset. It's about getting into the flow. By denying what you feel, you give up your control in the situation. When you try to suppress or avoid your true feelings, it typically throws you out of alignment and creates distrust in yourself.

Worries are a normal part of being human. For survival, this is simply how we evolved. They're a signal that comes from the psyche and the body. Our brains naturally seek problems to solve, even when nothing is necessarily wrong. Humans have made it this long because of this ability. 

You are not going to manifest negative things because you have anxiety or trauma or worries. You will, however, filter out the positives around you if you're constantly focused on the negatives.

 

 

A Simple Coping Skill: Catch & Release 

Instead of trying to control your thoughts for manifestation, try this simple technique I share with clients. Catch & Release.

Think of your thoughts that come into your mind as a fish that you’ve caught.

Each one you catch, ask yourself, ‘Do I want to keep this, or toss it back?’ If the thought is unhelpful, do your best not to fuel it or dwell on it. Let it be what it is, a thought, and release it back into the ether.

This practice enables you to acknowledge any difficult or stressful thoughts without getting stuck on the unhelpful ones.  I have used this myself since I learned it in therapy in 2011!

The thoughts you choose to keep may be wishes, ideas, inspirations, plans, epiphanies...

 

 

The Reality: Intentional Manifesting

The second reality of this manifestation myth is that manifesting is all about intention. Just like energy work or spell work, you charge things through your own intention.

For an example, we will use energetic protection. You can really do anything you want as protection, and it will work, as long as you are clear about what outcome you desire through your actions and always come from a place of love. You could wear a bracelet your child made you as protection. You could carry a crystal, or draw a sigil on your skin with essential oil. As long as you have faith in it and the intention behind it, it will work.

It’s the same for manifestation! With that, those stressful thoughts you’re worried about manifesting— are you charging them with the intention for them to happen, with love? Most likely, no. 

 

You've likely heard the saying, 'Where attention goes, energy flows'. This originally meant to maintain focus on a goal and be consistent in your action toward it. Some have used this quote in the context of manifesting negativity in your life by accident, which is fearmongering and only leads to spiritual bypassing or suppression of the true self.

 

 

Okay, but how does manifestation actually work?

Manifestation is a sacred art form. The pop culture version of ‘think-it-and-then-it-happens’ too often ignores the most important components for success.

Manifestation is about being clear in what you desire, why you desire it, then aligning your energy, actions, and mindset with this outcome.

You’re charging your intention with emotion and purpose.

You’re consciously creating space for your desire to take root. 

You're releasing the unhelpful thoughts that come into your consciousness.

Then, you are taking steps on the Earth plane through action to see your manifestation through.

You welcome this change in, with an open heart.

 

 

Why Isn't My Manifestation Working?

Sometimes, the subconscious or the shadow is at play. What’s under the surface can potentially influence what does show up in our lives. It can mean that you unknowingly sabotage something good because it doesn’t line up with your inner narrative. It can lead to feeling stuck or afraid. This is not manifestation gone wrong, but an opportunity for deep healing to take place.

When you feel misaligned or like you’re manifestations just are not working out, ask yourself:

• Am I living true to myself?
• Are my desires and actions really lining up? 
• What’s hiding in my shadow that’s ready to be seen and held?
• Where might I feel out of balance?
• In what way might I feel triggered right now?

You can use these as journal prompts or a tarot card inquiry. Tune into your heart center. Is there heaviness, pain, or fear? You may feel called to do energy work, reiki, shadow work, quantum healing, energy cord cutting, spell work, or some other healing modality that resonates with you in order to release and integrate your unconscious or shadow.

What a lot of modern spirituality does not always acknowledge is that healing is a potent way to boost your manifestation skills. Alignment matters, but so does patience, self compassion, and the courage to evolve.

 

 

Final Words

I care deeply about providing long-lasting results for my clients, whether they see me weekly or only once a year. The way to do this is to take a grounded, honest approach to spirituality and healing. If you’ve read this far, thank you so much for hearing me out. I know this isn’t the sugar-coated spirituality that sells, but it’s a truth I have come to in my own experiences. We don’t need to bypass our fears, we need to meet them with compassion. That’s how we create lives that feel nourishing and deeply aligned. 

Courtney Deerborn